Causes of depression and anxiety

Clear and Obvious causes of anxiety and depression

Identification of these causes in easy to see. They normally come from a prolonged difficult situation. Things like deaths, separations, tragedies, grief, bereavement, etc.

The body will be put under a lot of stress in these situations. Most times an end is in sight so there is hope.

Unclear causes of anxiety and depression

These are  lot more difficult to identify.

Often they arise from life long habits caused from childhood experiences and traumas.

A common scenario as example could be:

At a young age parents taught us to keep quiet and behave. We accepted this as normal and learnt to not complain or we would get in trouble.

In later life we still dont complain or express our feelings. We have done this for so long we do not even realise we are doing it. The deep down part of us that guides us to survive puts us on alert to escape the situation. We have suppressed this part of us for so long that our conscious mind does not feel this emotion to even react.

Our instincts carry on trying to get us out of danger. Putting our systems on alert and keeping them there. We feel tired and dont know why. We get anxious but feel we are happy. We have no ideas why we feel bad.

Now the work is to start looking at our lives and figuring out what is not right.

Often we have no idea what is causing these strong and negative emotions.

Life seems fine and happy. Its a total mystery why our body is doing this to us.
These feelings come from your deepest level of consciousness, these are your instincts. Over the years your conscious mind has learned to mask certain problems it feels you are not good at resolving. Your instincts work differently. They are the last guard to your very survival. They see what is going on, add up all the problems and when things get to a certain danger level put you on alert, ready to react.

The best way to go about discovering the source/sources of these issues can be by going through our lives and dealing with everything.

Start with the easy stuff and work your way up.

See how you feel after each job. Are you feeling better. Is there still more to do.

1 – Do all the jobs you have been putting off.

For example:-
Talk to the neighbour that is annoying.
Go to the bank and deal with any issues there.
Ask about a pay rise.
etc etc

2 – Get organised.

Write everything down in a list.
Prioritise the list in order.
Set a time when you will do each job.

Keep checking back on your emotions after each stage.
See if you have found the one thing causing the pain.

Often the feelings can come from an accumulation of a lot of things you have been putting off.

3 – Resolving issues with the right approach

Many people can over or under react to things or situations they need to deal with. This can lead to a reluctance to deal with future issues because everything went so wrong last time.

Maybe you did not want to express your feelings, felt embarrassed to just did not want to bother anyone with your problems. You might have felt that your feelings are not worth bothering anyone about. Well they are. You have as much right to express yourself as anyone else but in the right way at the right level.

Bottling things up then exploding is not a strategy that works. Its time to learn a better way. To realise you are equal to anyone else.

Before dealing with an issue practice how best to put your point across. Get your lines and words straight. Right notes and pointers you can refer to during the conversation. Above all do not lose your temper. Keep cool, say your part, listen to the response and then reply. It may not go well the first time but learn from any mistakes you make and go back better prepared.

The main point is that no one have more or less rights in this world then you. Remember this always, remind yourself.